Can We #LAUGH?
Re: Making America Sane Again
Smart folks typically avoid thorny topics like politics and religion. Let’s talk about both.
As an independent thinker with Demoblican sympathies, I bought two Make America Sane Again hats — one blue and one red — to wear jokingly while engaging with hyper-partisan friends on both “sides.” Sadly, some were offended, even by such non-partisan humor. It makes me wonder: Can we #LAUGH?
We can laugh, physiologically speaking. But can we #Listen, #Affirm, and #Understand, with #Grace and #Humor (#LAUGH)?
These are ways I’m striving to be a better “humor being.” It’s either #LAUGH, or more Insanity, Disgust, Insults, Outrage, Contempt— Yeah, you get my drift. Indignation over true injustice is good. Insanity which amplifies injustice is bad, whether lawless left or raging right.
This is not about our elected representatives, but we, the people. Momma always said, “It takes two to fight.” Is it any wonder we do? Biased filter bubbles fuel outrage and a habit of contempt. If these are poison, the antidote is genuine dialogue which upholds truth over tribe and love over all.
With a commitment to civility, politics and religion provide opportunities to pursue truth and love. To really listen and understand. To overcome bigotry, or intolerance of differing opinions. Face-to-face dialogue is ideal, since body language and nonverbal cues are essential in good communication.
Non-partisan projects like AllSides, Braver Angels, Living Room Conversations, and National Conversation Project can help with such efforts. For example, Living Room Conversations facilitates online, face-to-face group discussions with people from varied perspectives.
How can we #LAUGH, in these or other contexts? Good question. Thanks for asking.
✔︎ #Listen carefully and ask questions to clarify.
✔︎ #Affirm the person, even if we disagree with their perspective.
✔︎ #Understand what they’re saying, not just a straw man version.
✔︎ Show #Grace by attacking arguments, not people.
✔︎ Show #Humor, laughing at ourselves and with others.
Listening and questions stem from curiosity. What if we were more curious, less furious? What if we thought of the U.S. as US, not Us vs. Them? What if we embraced our motto e pluribus unum, or “out of many, one”? After all, “United we stand, divided we fall.”
#LAUGH helps me pursue these ideals with humor — especially to laugh at myself, since I fall short. Likely way more than I know. My wife says I’m “clueless.” I have no idea what she’s talking about. (Okay, maybe a little…)
As a critical thinker, who values logic and the sciences, I sometimes struggle to #Listen beyond words and hear the heart. To #Affirm and #Understand before challenging an argument. To show #Grace and #Humor, when relating to someone whose rage overrides reason.
On the other hand, as an artist with a sensitive side, I can be the fool with whom I fail to relate. Yes, I just admitted I can’t relate to myself at times. One look in the mirror and I say, “Nope, not today!” Yet we need mirrors to see blind spots. I could be wrong but… I think the problem with blind spots is we can’t see them. (Just a theory.)
My blind spots and failure to #LAUGH can be exposed when dealing with diehard Republicans and Democrats. Some are family and friends I love. Some I even like. And some are NUTS!
It’s difficult to comprehend how insane people can be… unless you are. As for this nut…
✱ I hesitate to join any group which would have me as a member.
✱ Call me a party pooper, but I don’t enjoy hyper-partisan politics.
✱ On varied issues, I often agree, in part, with each major party.
More people identify as independents, than with either major party. Yet both sides can act as if views are not up for debate, and broadly condemn the other. It’s not debatable that there’s too much damned condemnation!! (See what I did there?)
Not long ago, our previous president called out cancel culture, and got a smackdown as an out-of-touch baby boomer… from the left! Obama berated as an oblivious boomer was a bummer. (Say that five times fast.) The point is… Where’s the respect?
Three popular books address cancel culture, disrespect, and other trends: Don’t Label Me, by Irshad Manji; The Coddling of the American Mind, by Greg Lukianoff and Jonathan Haidt; and The Righteous Mind, by Jonathan Haidt. They all make positive contributions to the discussion about respect, diversity of thought, challenging our assumptions, and finding common ground.
Assumptions can hinder efforts to listen, affirm, and understand, with grace. Shattering assumptions is a way to find humor. Political memes are often based on hilariously false ones. Like they say, “‘ASSUME’ makes an ‘ASS’ out of ‘U’ and ‘MEMES.’” Anywho…
The Righteous Mind points to how liberals, conservatives, and libertarians are wired differently yet have shared moral foundations — though it’s hard sometimes to recognize them in others. Haidt comes from a liberal, secular perspective, and challenged his own assumptions to understand and value conservatives.
Far too often, we see good people cling to false assumptions and even turn on each other. Yet imagine what we can accomplish if we recognize our shared values, seek common ground, and work together!
One problem though… To do this with #Grace and #Humor requires generosity and humility, which can be a challenge for most of us. (Not me. Humility is my greatest strength.)
This is already long, and we barely touched on the role of faith. It seems worthwhile to mention religion can refer to a system of faith, or to anything which is considered of utmost importance. (For some folks, politics is their religion.) As for me, I appreciate this expression of faith, from Immanuel Church in Nashville:
➊ I’m a complete idiot.
➋ My future’s incredibly bright.
➌ Anyone can get in on this.
Might recognition that we’re all “idiots” foster generosity and humility on all sides? Could this empower us to move forward to a brighter future? Can anyone truly get in on this?
Perhaps we just need to remember, as the mantra “Live, Laugh, Love” reminds us: The final word is Love.
